When you go through something major....you have two choices...run to God or run from God..... for me, the obvious choice is to run to Him...I don't see how I could breathe otherwise, or understand any of this mess. God didn't do this. My husband did this. I don't blame anyone but my husband. I have had people ask me if I was angry with God....I am actually more in love with Him....He is my perfect husband, the lover of my soul, my constant, my renewal, my prince. To know Him on such an intimate level makes you complete...it makes you whole.....a person cannot complete you, only God can do that. To be honest, I am thankful for my suffering...I am thankful for this death in my life...because it has forced me to know who Kristin is, to know my strength...it has forced me to see God, breathe God, feel God, be held by God...

what is the craziest thing is knowing the Creator of all things wants me. He wants me in any form...any shape...my lowest points of wailing for hours on the floor barely breathing, He found me beautiful...He found me acceptable, but not only that, He picked me up and carried me to shore. He saw me drowning and rescued me. All I had to do was hold onto Him. All I had to do was believe. My future is unknown, but my future is going to be amazing!!!!...I know it because I believe it. I am trusting in the unseen...I am expecting great things....and I am excited about it...

xoxo